Meditation, my journey, so far

Deep breathing and focus on the breath is just one beginning practice towards meditation, yet,  Meditation is not this.

As an artist I could get “lost” in my work. Deep in concentration. I often get lost in ecstasy when dancing, I  lose track of time similar to meditation, yet this is not meditation either!

If you get lost in asana practice, nature,making music or art or gardening, you may have entered an altered state similar to meditation, many would call this meditation. I would call it a taste; there is vastly more.  

I had learned and share guided relaxation decades ago. I practiced techniques to “cool-down” students ending fitness classes. Now I do this in savasana and restorative yoga classes. Students greatly appreciate these moments of peace. The benefits of deep relaxation practice are numerous; calmer mind, increased energy, release of tensions in the body, Yet, meditation is not this.

In the early 1990’s I attended a meditation class taught by Deepak Chopra, He did a guided meditation that was a profound experience for me. I think of him often now, and have read his books, though for many years I didn’t practice meditation.

In the mid 90’s I met an extraordinary individual who was able to move and heal with energy. He spent many hours a day in meditation. At that time I didn’t understand the connection.  I was blessed to have had those years of friendship and healing with Jeremiah. He practiced meditation and many people received profound healing and guidance from him. He was a great teacher, a fountain of love. I met him when he was in his 40’s. He had survived a tragic accident at 19 years old.   After this injury (broken neck) he lived decades longer,surprising medical experts. He was genuinely at peace, even though his body suffered much pain as a quadriplegic.  He practiced meditation daily!  

In the late 1990s I was introduced to HeartMath biofeedback.  Direct measurements of the metabolic and systolic heart rhythms combined with techniques to calm the mind showed directly in the program’s feedback. I used this program myself and with children who had experienced trauma.  HeartMath  is great technology and the HeartMath Institute is growing in it’s scope. It is a marvelous tool to help in relaxation and self awareness and self control (emotional health, PTSD) 

This is not meditation, though it is a very good starting point for many people.

Discipline and daily practice opens up worlds of possibilities and awareness.

In 2009 I began study of Reiki, my Masters (teachers) instructed me to do it every day.  I did Reiki meditation and energy work on myself daily for a year.  This form of meditation I was able to stick with. Within months I began to shift into more awareness and profound peace. After Level 2, I began working on others as well and "saw" their inner beauty/ light energy and a flow of love.  Reiki meditation and healing opened up new sensibilities and awareness. I  continued Reiki training to (Masters) Level 3. I came to understand more of what Jeremiah and Deepak Chopra were teaching! Other healers and traditions from many cultures and meditation is at the center of their practices.

These experiences where a good foundation for true meditation.

In 2010 I had the opportunity to take over a yoga class which I had been attending. I knew from past training that if I was to teach yoga, I had to practice asana and silent seated meditation daily, which I began in the months before taking over the class.

When I got to where I could sit still for an hour meditation, I would only have fleeting moments where there was peace, where the mental chatter would subside.

These brief moments where so profound that I continued finding it well worth the hour of sitting every day!

Silent meditation showed me how noisy my mind was and even now, how noise my mind can be!

Now, often during the day no matter how “stressful” or what events are going on, I can return to that peace within a few conscious breaths. This allows me to stay authentic and present. When I have peace with-in I can be present to others in a meaningful way.

Have I experienced enlightenment?  

Yes! and no, and yes! It can be fleeting and can be found again in meditation.

True enlightenment is when that peace is carried out into every part of every day. 

Personally, I do yoga asana to quiet my mind and prepare my body for seated meditation.  When I began daily practice of both, I experienced amazing healing for my mind and body, and more… beyond words, language and description! I have also come to understand the energy that is within and around us.

 Asana can lift us out of discomfort in the body. Meditation can help us have peace even when the body is in pain.
 “Illuminated emancipation, freedom, unalloyed and untainted bliss await you, but you have to choose to embark on the Inward Journey to discover it.”          BKS Iyengar

“disturbances of the mind and emotions fade away, and we are able to see true reality.” BKS Iyengar

Peace, Christina

P.S.  I'm sharing a video,that "speaks" about and "shows" meditation, yet,what can be discovered, and experienced through meditation is beyond what media can show!  Watching and listening may bring about emotions, yet, this not it either.
inspiration to meditate

Fallen yogi

      The Fallen Yogi, ...with dementia

As a yoga instructor, I didn't want to share my personal history of being away from yoga,  Asana (poses) meditation and the other 6 limbs of yoga.  I am happy to say I got over that; Happy because I realize there is a level of wisdom that comes from having fallen and climbing back up, which is worth sharing and may help others.
     I know how it feels to do a forward fold (touch your toes) and discover I could barely reach my knees.  I know how a busy mind and out of shape body can't hold the simplest balancing pose (even modified). I was not a yogi for more than two decades of my life. Though I could say "I was busy, working, being a single mom, bread-winner, home-owner" I stopped making excuses.  I faced the reality that I had sold-out, and gotten so out of touch with the inner self, and self-love that it literally made me very sick. The primary symptom being *dementia. Leaving me with little good to offer those around me.  I completely understand the loss of vitality and the unhappiness that comes from a stressful life.
     I lived for a couple years with the fear that I was losing my cognitive functioning. I thought I had Alzheimer's disease or a brain tumor, but mostly my mind was a constant stream of useless worries, dissections of my past and fearful projections into a bleak future. This mental clutter and my clinging to "work" as the answer to everything, kept me running in the rat-race while the quality of my life disintegrated. I was just surviving, existing, going through the motions. Though I was "active" it was in a limited way and with so much tension and misalignment that I was wearing myself down rather than healing myself. Movement is a great healer, but not just any movement, and the occasional yoga classes didn't prevent my falling.
COMING HOME TO YOGA,  At  the age of 48, I started with 1-2 classes a week for a month. This was the only place were I experienced relief, felt at home, or had any sense of well-being and peace. Because I had been a yogi long ago, I knew to return to doing daily yoga, asana and meditation. The changes began to happen quickly, which was motivating so, I kept at it, it became my medicine to thrive in a life worth living.
         The first change was my mind stopped racing long enough (initially less than a minute) for me to remember what calm and peace where.  I began just closing my eyes and taking a deeper breath and recalling that minute which brought another brief moment of calm. With-in days, my physical body was resting better at night and I could see gains in strength and alignment in the first week which brought about increased energy. In that first month I noticed subtle increases in flexibility (I was never naturally flexible). and after a few months increased flexibility of mind begin to re-emerge; I was more open to new possibilities and ways of relating to others.  Most importantly my heart was more open, I wasn't numb, and I knew I was part of something greater, connected, a part of the One.  Perhaps, because of years of yoga dance and other various movement practices stored in my memory (mind and body-memory), I noticed the subtle changes more than many people would. Or it may have been the desperation after having fallen so far. 
How do you to start daily practice? That is very individual.  I began doing 6-10 sun salutations and meditating for 10 minutes, DAILY, in the morning. This created profound changes with-in a few days. This practice set a quieter tone/mind/vibration which I could access throughout the day. I was very aware that I had so much farther to go, so I increased, after just a few days to one hour yoga Asana and 30 minutes meditation. Then within another couple weeks to 45-60 minutes of meditation. It became my daily medicine, and my health insurance.  Now after more than 3 years (over 1095 consecutive days) I can't even begin to express in 100 blog posts all the benefits, joy, peace and clarity that I have gained. Remember I "had a long way to go", now I can find peace in starting one deep breath, most of time, no matter what is going on around me.
 ~ Namaste ~ Christina   
update March 19, 2020 - I'm well, no dementia, I'm 60 now and still doing yoga, moer advanced than I thought possible when writing this!!!

Happy New Year of Yoga

All the reasons for not getting to a yoga class are actually the reasons too get to one.

This is what I hear, over and over from people of varying ages.  and then the truth …

“I’m not flexible”--- yoga helps you become more flexible!

“I’m out of shape-“-- yoga helps you get in shape!

“I’m too overweight” yoga helps with weight loss!

“I’m too old”--- You are never too old to reap the benefits of yoga! (yoga is age defying***)

“I don’t have the energy”- Yoga gives you energy!

“I tried it once ….”Try a different class or teacher –e.g. if your over 50 look for a teacher over 50

                I am most concerned for boomers people getting older (older than they have to be).

 These are all statements related to ego- the ego doesn’t want you to feel better, be better, find peace. Ego says,  " have to be great immediately.   Truth is; yoga is non-competitive!!!!  The other yoga students are focused on themselves not YOU!!!  The inner spirit on the other hand knows what is best and that health, energy and peace come from mindfulness in movement.

 Yes, for some it might be better to start with Tai Chi, senior or gentle yoga. But to lessen your movement more and more is choosing to age faster, is eliminating future joy from dancing, playing with children, easily getting up from and down, sitting in the grass on a sunny day.

  The less you move the less energy you have, the less you move the less you are able to move and the more likely you are to become injured when you have to move. The more likely you are to fall. The less you move the faster you age. Moving mindfully after injury is the best way to heal and re-gain flexibility.

  The biggest mistake people make in yoga or any “fitness” activity is to forget to tune-in and honor your own limits- where you are at, today. The second biggest mistake is to forget you are more than a mechanical body, that the mind, spirit and emotions all are involved. Yoga is more about training the mind than anything else (as are  Martial Arts and Tia Chi)   The physical moves or postures are just the tip of the iceberg, what is underneath is discipline, practice, process, change of attitudes, calming of the mind, focus and Breath.    

 

 ***check out this link

 a-meeting-in-central-park-with-the-oldest-living-yoga-teacher-in-the-world-photographed-by-robert-sturman/

and this link    never give up- this is a super inspiring video! 

Thanks for reading my Blog-  Christina (an over 50 year old Yoga teacher)