"Have you lost weight?"

"You look great"   "have you lost weight?"  

 Recently after improving my posture several people said this to me. Hearing this hit a nerve that just made me sad. Why? I'll tell you why! I hadn't lost any weight and didn't need to either!

It is a cultural obsession that "looking good" and "losing weight" are so linked together. Women diet when they don't  need to.

It is possible to be too thin, And it is healthier to have a little extra weight than not enough weight.
Why not just look into someone's eyes and say "you look great!" period!
 or say "you look great, you must be taking good care of yourself?"

 or "you look great you must be feeling good".

Some extra pounds is not obesity, there is a big difference and as a culture we need to stop buying into the fashion and diet weight loss industry's tactics! 

 I have met people who literally will "not be friends with anyone who is more than a few pounds overweight", saying "it just grosses me out". This is beyond judgmental, it is sad.

Obesity is a cultural problem and health issue in the USA, but many people who are full-bodied and rounder suffer so much trying to fit a norm that is sick and unattainable.

We all know by now, how much photographic manipulation goes into the ultra-thin images of women in fashion magazines. We know about eating disorders such as anorexia and bulimia.

Billions of dollars get spent on weight loss and diet programs that don't work -And advertising that  portrays an underweight ideal that is impossible for  people to attain.

 I love many people who are "overweight" by western popular culture and who are beautiful! Most of the women I spent time with in North Africa would be considered "fat" here, whereas there, the standards of beauty there include fuller bodied, robust women.

Beauty comes in many shapes and sizes. We need to broaden our perception of beauty, and not judge each-other by the cultural ideals pervasive in the media.
"You look great" "have you lost weight"... I also heard this often at a time in my life where I struggled financially and wasn't eating enough. I didn't feel like I got a compliment, and I was reminded again how hungry I was, and how being hungry kept me up the night before.
  I wish I would've said "YES, I LOST WEIGHT, MY BODY FAT IS UNHEALTHILY LOW, WHY DO YOU THINK THAT IS LOOKING GREAT? 
I have been heavy enough to have negative effects on my vitality. I went through hating myself and feeling like I was disgusting. I  was sunk in self hatred over my "appearance".
I started to love myself exactly as I was, which lead to things like walking, hiking, dancing and enjoying moving. Once I loved myself more, my weight stabilized around 140pds which is healthy for me.
So maybe the next person you notice looking good you might just say "You are beautiful, I love you!" Better yet, find the beauty in everyone around you!

               
You are all beautiful, and I love you. Namaste, Christina